Okay so I know this isn't the story that my readers want right now... However due to some legalities I can not disclose the real tea you you've been anticipating. Therefore in the meantime i'll share a little bit about a lesson I've learned on The Road To Recovery. Starting with The Rebound ...
Okay so getting over a relationship IS NOT EASY, and starting over with someone new seems almost IMPOSSIBLE ( Lowkey SCARY ) & In my case getting over my relationship with my fiance, which as you know was a 7 year occupancy was .... Uhmmm ... I guess we can say
& UNFORTUNATE ... ( For Him Of Course LOL JK )
Okay ... Okay ... I WILL CONTINUE
I would like to hope that our separation was something that affected us both... But sometimes a man's purpose in a woman's life is solely to help her become a better woman for another man.
"I was the book he never read, but kept on the nightstand anyway. "
Just because someone desires you doesn't mean they value you.
Never keep someone your priority if they only consider you an option
You are not a backup plan, and definitely not a second choice.
ANYWAY .... One of the key tricks I used to help brainwash myself into letting go and moving on was by following these principles I like to call
THE REBOUND THEORY!
Let's Clarify For My Non Sports Lovers :
In basketball, a Rebound, referred to as a board, is a statistic awarded to a player who retrieves the ball after a missed field goal or free throw. Rebounds are also given to a player who tips in a missed shot on his team's offensive end.
The term may also refer to a romantic relationship that a person has during the Rebound period, or to the partner in such a relationship. ...
THE REBOUND THEORY
- By Felicity Swindell
This theory does not necessarily correlate with the idea of the typical rebound stigma of relationships. It's more so referring to the very first boy you begin to date after your breakup.
Here are 4 stages I have developed to help the transition, as best as possible.
Stage 1 : Dribble
Take a moment to recognize that their is a place for sadness ...
Cry and Cry a lot, let it all out until you become so disgusted at the idea of ever crying again.
* I personally recommended the consumption of Mr. Goodbars, Vanilla Ice Cream,Wild Berry Muffins, Pina Coladas, Red Wine, & Tacos. Lots of Tacos
Allow yourself time to use the transitional period between being in a relationship and being single, to reevaluate yourself. Often times in relationships, especially long term relationships you find yourself compromising pieces of yourself for the longevity and betterment of your companionship. However you are single now, rediscover the pieces of you that you've diminished.
Ask yourself ...
What do I Like ?
What makes me happy ?
What do I want ?
Where do I want to go ?
NO ONE IS GOING TO LOVE YOU ... UNTIL YOU LOVE YOURSELF !
To love is a brave thing. To be loved braver, but allowing yourself to love yourself ? That takes the most courage of all.
and when you are ready...
Am I capable of emotional attachment ?
What do I look for in a man ?
Stage 2 :Rebound
Love when you are ready not when you are Lonely
Wait for the boy that would do anything to be your everything
Rebound relationships are an awesome way to boost your ego, but on the flip side if you are not careful you can completely shatter an innocents person's life.
Stage 3 :Shoot
SHOOT YOUR SHOT BABY ! (Not Literally Ofc )
I do not support the idea of a woman approaching a man she is interested in. Call me what you want, but you can't call me THIRSTY )
In this case shooting your shot is referring to the individual you have revitalized, who is ready to go out into the dating world again.
Stage 4 :Score
It is now draft season ladies are you ready ?
Pick your Recruits
I advise Only 3 for beginners, but 5 if you been off the market for a while.
I Felicity Swindell herby 100% endorse giving yourself different options, I mean you are rediscovering what and to whom you are interested In.
(This is only the draft | DON'T GO GIVING AWAY THE GOODIES }
Don't be out here saying Felicity said its okay to be a ...
Because I said NO SUCH THING !
Okay now its time to choose your team, the initial goal here is to minimize your numbers. Therefore if you started with 10 pick your starting 5, and etc
Take some time to get to know your team...
WITH OUGHT SEXUAL INTERCOURSE.
Lock that heart and have a competition & make it a fierce one because after all your heart is the prize, and that is VERY VALUABLE!
*Keep a mental Note of everything.
Once you feel your competition is complete, Ask yourself Who is The MVP Of The Team ? Choose ...
Then lay off all other players.
ALL PLAYERS I MEAN THAT !!!
Next Spend some more time getting to your MVP...
Take as much time as you need
Allow yourself to be vulnerable, don't hold this man to criteria based off the heartbreak of your former lover. Vulnerability is the only way to allow you heart to feel true pleasure. Love didn't hurt you someone who didn’t know how to love hurt you, and you can not let a heart that doesn't love you keep you from the one that will.
Lastly Do not be afraid to start over, it is a brand new opportunity to rebuild what you truly want.
I hope this helps at all... I know personally that this is much easier said then done, but you can do it .. I BELIEVE IN YOU !
Special acknowledgement to the man who was not afraid to come pick up my broken pieces, my Most Valuable Player CW.
Thank you for reminding me what butterflies feel like.
- Special Recognition Of Inspo